A couple of years ago I started noticing talk online about art journals. Intrigued, I googled the term and afterward decided that I would start one of my own. I figured a journal would be a way to encourage myself to draw or paint more often, and the small format would be less intimidating than a full-size canvas or sheet of paper.

I bought a small (6 X 9 inch) pad of paper for my journal. Not wanting to mess up the pristine sheets, I cut even smaller (4 X 4.5 inch) pieces of watercolor paper on which I’d paint and then tape them into the journal. I decided that I would paint in watercolors, the medium I’d recently begun exploring. Gathering my supplies, I began art journaling.

The small size and the separate pieces of paper were just what I needed to get over my artist’s block, my fear of messing up a sheet of paper or a canvas because “I’m not good enough”. The loose sheets of watercolor paper were helpful because, if I made a mess of one, I could always throw it out and start over.

I was creating little works of art on a semi-regular basis (see previous posts). It was fun. Then the Pandemic hit and I totally lost my creative urge for a while. So much so that it began to scare me a bit–would I ever want to paint again? Not that the world would suffer if I didn’t, but I worried that I would. Creating, whether it be art or something else, is part of who I am.

Eventually the creative urge was reawakened, and I finally got up the nerve today to pick up a paintbrush. I felt rusty and am a bit frustrated with the result–the flowers are so-so, and although I was trying to show the perspective of looking down into a flowerpot, I worry that what I created instead is a weird-shaped stumpy pot. Oh well. It HAS been a long time since I last struggled over a painting. Besides being frustrating, it also felt pretty good.

I’d encourage anyone who has a yearning to create art but is intimidated by the idea of filling a whole canvas or page to give art journaling a try. I’m using mine as practice, because my even bigger goal is to illustrate a story I used to tell my kids when they were little. I figure that I need all the practice I can get.

You might as well dream big, right?